Today was a lazy day, in fact it’s the laziest day i’ve had in ages! Fact!

My day began with me waking up at 11 o’clock which is unheard of as my usual time of awakening from my coffin is 6am, seven days a week, 365 days a year. I then did a gym workout as i felt guilty for having a lay in so in my mind i thought i would make up for it by punishing my body and telling him what a bad boy he was for over indulging in the comfort of my bed. The workout was half hearted as i really wanted my bed, so i cut it short and luxuriated in the sauna! i then got home with the intention of doing all the odd jobs around the house and then to work on some projects until this evening where i’ll probably call my best mate josh and go out for dinner somewhere. That was the plan, especially as i was feeling double guilty.

I sat down on my sofa and then like a black hole, it consumed me, i began to lay down immersing myself in the fluffiness of the cushions… oh how comfortable it was. The right side of my brain decided to take over and told my body “let’s just watch a few episodes of Planet Earth and then we’ll get up and do all the boring stuff you need to do”. Luckily for me and the right side of my brain, the junk food draw is only an arms length away and so with that i began to suffocate my mouth with Kit Kats and Doritos (not at the same time). It’s ironic really as Kit Kats slogan is ‘Take a break, have a Kit Kat’ and so with that i did, well i took a break from doing nothing but it still counts.

This didn’t just last a few episodes it’s lasted until now where i’m still in a horizontal position enjoying my right for free laziness. However throughout the day i’ve felt like a naughty school kid, why do i feel so guilty? Why do i keep having a argument with myself about why it’s ok to have a day off? Why is lazy such a dirty word?

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i mean i generally work hard, i do exercise properly pretty much every day and i’m barely in my house however i still have this annoying guilt which is stopping me from really enjoying myself. I thought about it and i think i’ve cracked it!

Apple, Fitbit, Vitality, Virgin gym and any other company that comes out with ‘sitting down is the new cancer’ or has an app which tracks my weekly progress and when you look at today compared to the week you feel like you’ve let yourself down. These companies who are ultimately trying to sell you a product are so in your face they make you feel so guilty about your lifestyle that you end up splurging £500 on an apple watch just so you don’t look like a slob.

Maybe it’s a bit of a stretch but i do generally feel, we as human beings can go over the top when it comes to lifestyle, even when i look at social media all i see is skinny models taking selfies about how they’ve lost 9lbs by doing HIIT workouts or people taking pictures of their green smoothies with a hashtag saying #LivingCleanIsTheDream. Well sometimes i don’t want to live clean, sometimes i want to be a bit dirty, shut my curtains and indulge in some Pringles and cookies because you know what it tastes good!

In all fairness i’m sure it’s my own fault for feeling guilty but my point is, social media and brands are going OTT on this whole lets get healthy to live longer thing and that its every where you turn. So please guys have a day off and be proud of it, post pictures of all your naughty treats, tell people you haven’t moved positions for 6 hours and who cares if you’ve put on a stone in 1 day…  all that counts is if your happy! If not moving all day works for cats then it can work for you.

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Written by Dan Lazard

Here to expose the weirdness on the internet. Presenter for Discovery Science & Trending News Blogger. My views are my own. Check out the blog on FomoDan

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